Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
