I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
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