please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
