I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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