Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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