my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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