i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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