Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
