A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize