I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
