at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
