Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
