I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
