when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
