uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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