if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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