ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
