How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
