I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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