May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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