just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
