that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
