don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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