can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
