**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
why do cheetos always look like penises
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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