You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
