one two three fourrrrnication!
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize