Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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