people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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