ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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