we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I didn't notice because vodka
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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