If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
