So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
wow bdsm is so cute
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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