she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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