I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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