yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
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