I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize