I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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