i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize