he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
