if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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