DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
