Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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