all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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