I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
