everyone is single if you try hard enough
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
