I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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