He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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