i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
