That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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