she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
